The Unravelling Of Ego To Reveal True Self

What does it mean to go on a spiritual path?

Maybe surprisingly, it's not about deities, beliefs, crystals or angels. It means taking the steps to know and understand the True You. The True You is very different to the You you're brought up to know. Years of brainwashing from peers will set you up with beliefs about your Self and life that simply aren't true. It's not about religion, it's about YOU.

For example, we're led to believe we have a soul (that's if you believe that at all). This simply isn't true, WE ARE souls - what we have is a body and mind to allow us to experience and grow here on this planet.

Mostly we let our Ego (Exaggerated sense of self-importance/what we think we are) rule our words, thoughts and actions and unless we become aware of this and get our Higher Self to take back control, it's hard to be truly spiritual.

It's helped me to put into a list what is Ego and what is Self. Although, making a list made me laugh, as that itself is an Ego thing to do! 

Here's the short list I made for personal reference:

Ego/Sense of Self MeMySoulAndEye.blogspot.co.uk	Soul/Spirit/True Self MeMySoulAndEye.blogspot.co.uk
Analytical	Understanding
Anger	Calm
Before/after (past/future)	Now/this moment
Believe	Know
Blocked	Creative
Cold	Empathetic
Comparative	United
Competing	Content
Conditional	Unconditional
Controlling	Surrendering
Cynic	Has faith
Deceitful	Honest
Defensive	Open
Different	Similar
Doing	Being
Excluding	Including
Fear	Love
Fitting in	Freedom
Forceful	Supportive
Following	Leading (by example)
Greed	Generosity
Guilt	Improvement
Head	Heart
Hinder	Help
Hoard	Give
Irresponsible/blaming	Responsible
Judging	Accepting
Jealous	Admiring
Knowledge	Wisdom
Label	Value (moral)
Lack	Gratitude
Lesson	Experience
Materialistic	Recognising abundance
Mean	Kind
Overbearing/bossy	Co-operative
Personal agenda	Oneness
Power hungry	Humble
Stuck	Growing
Think	Aware
Uncaring	Sympathetic
Unforgiving/resentful	Forgiving
Wanting	Thankful
MeMySoulAndEye.blogspot.co.uk	MeMySoulAndEye.blogspot.co.uk

When you honestly examine all that you've come to know about yourself with a view to getting back to the real you, it opens up many a 'can of worms'. It takes some degree of bravery to do this (I mean to really do it - I previously thought I had, but I hadn't come close!). Essentially, you face daily, all your fears and self doubts over and over again until you find what is useful and what isn't. It's like being born again, rocking what was your foundation for years and replacing it with something completely new. It's not about suffering, being depressed or consumed by this process - it's about having the courage to do it with integrity and no other agenda.

However, once you start this process what was once real, now becomes fake and it can be hard to know what to even talk about with the oldest of friends. It can be a lonely battle ground with your Shadow Self (the bits you hide because you don't like them), not that it has to be as there is a spiritual community brimming with like-minded souls for support.

You see, we are all on a spiritual path, it's just some are more aware of it than others, more willing to knowingly slay the demons.

This last week I have been feeling inferior to others. This is, of course, Egotistical (Lower Self). How can I be inferior when we all come from the same Source and just have different lessons to learn?

I know this and I'm desperately trying to get back to Source. It hasn't stopped me comparing my blog to others and finding it less popular, not as well laid out as others, wondering why I'm not able to do Reiki II yet (my relationship with reiki has been long ready, but my spiritual and business side isn't ready yet), why am I 37 years old and still living in a damp rented house? It is all my own responsibility and actually irrelevant stuff in the scheme of things, but it doesn't stop the hurt.

No-one said my chosen path would be easy and they were right. Still, it's my path and I'm going to continue to follow it, as I know it will lead me Home.

The revelations; realisations, pure truth and bliss that occasionally shines through are more than enough to tell me to keep on going, even in the darkest days.

Wherever you are on your chosen path, may it be beautiful, truth-filled and useful to you all. 

Remember, the Ego is not your enemy or 'bad', it can teach you a lot and without it, we wouldn't know our Soul.

Love and light from Lou and her very useful Ego. xx

Keeping The Faith In Times Of Trouble

Ever felt like you were being tested? "These things were sent to 'try' us", that sort of thing?

During the past few weeks I have been 'tried' to about as much as I can take. I'm sure you've all had times like that? Maybe you're going through a time like that right now or know someone who is. I'm sending love out to any who are.

Want to know how it all started? Are you sitting comfortably? About 4 weeks ago, on a Friday, I was doing a reiki self-treatment when a very loud and clear message was received completely out of the blue. The message was..."Your cats mission here on earth is up. You got him to be a best friend to your son and now your son has a best friend at college." WHAT?! It was clear I was being forewarned to prepare for our cats departure. Devastated doesn't quite cover it. I sobbed and shook the whole way through the remainder of the treatment. My cat was perfectly healthy: I didn't understand the message.

The following Monday my cat was sick. I immediately took him to the vets. Even then everything seemed fine and the vet said the cat was incredibly healthy for a 16 year old, but his teeth need scraping and they'd want to do a 'dental'. It's normal practice to check older cats blood and urine before an op, so that's what happened.

Once the results were in, I was called but told I'd best go in for the results. By this time I was starting to fear (I know, I'm still battling that beast!) the worst.

I was told that our cat has renal failure and that they wouldn't want to do the op, as a result. All his issues were manageable so I was still hopeful he'd be OK.

Choose fear or faith

To try to put it into perspective, he is not 'just' a cat to us. He's the centre of our universe, everything in the house revolves around our love for him and has done for over 14 years. Rather like when someone has a new baby, but if that baby stayed a baby for all those years. Most people will understand this, but I know for some it will be incomprehensible to get so close to an animal.

 Our cat making himself comfy

 Our cat looking up at us with his big gold eyes

Our cat enjoying a good sleep and dream

There's something about people (or pets) passing over that I don't handle well at all. It's definitely something I need to work on. Strange really as I have regular conversations with one of my nanas that passed years ago. You'd think I'd handle it better than most, but for some reason...I don't!

So far we've had a few traumatic weeks of thinking todays the day he leaves, oh no it isn't, oh yes it is (not quite as pantomime as it sounds). Many of you will know the endless rollercoaster of emotions when someone is terminally ill.

Several other tests have been thrown in on the way, but I will not write about these. I've been on a low vibe so was bound to attract other nasty stuff in to my life too.

I got to breaking point, as our cat wouldn't eat and was seriously ill. I couldn't handle the upset any more and I was so angry about it all. It feels like this is part of my chosen path: a necessary lesson and so I took to my Asana (wool mat used for Shakti invoking meditation). I was too wound up to meditate. Instead I had what can only be described as a rant at Shakti, Shiva, reiki, angels and even the 'G' word (God). I wanted to know why, I needed help and I was giving up this stupid path anyway - everyone is leaving me, so why should I stay?

Archangel Metatron came to me and said he has another mission for my cat very soon and that he would look after him. Even this wasn't good enough for me. I felt guilty as I knew it would be hard for our cat too, but I was asking for support for me. I changed tack, I asked for healing for our cat and support to get him through.

I gave our cat regular reiki even though I knew it would help him leave his physical body. This taught me to trust reiki to do right by him and for me to surrender as the channel and reiki as the healer. I fully expected our cat to pass away soon, he deteriorated rapidly.

In the end the vet gave us 48 hours to get him well or bring him back into the surgery. I did another reiki and his condition worsened. It came to me to take him into the vets even though 12 hours, not 48, had passed. He was admitted as an emergency case and we all thought this was 'it'.

Our cat is now home and his kidney function is within normal range. The main issue is his teeth and if anti-biotics don't sort them, he will likely need that 'dental', but if he has it, he has a very good prognosis.

Things are not always as they seem

Essentially, I have learnt so much from this experience and although I haven't enjoyed it, I'm grateful for the lessons learnt:

* Surrender to reiki with complete detachment from the outcome. Reiki works in mysterious ways and in a funny way I think it was teaching me this.

* Ask for help when you need it i.e. before you die from a broken heart (don't expect anything less than drama from me!).

* In having the cat in cat hospital, we had 48 hours without him physically being here, we knew he was somewhere else but we couldn't see him. This was reiki giving us a trial run and proving we will survive when he passes, though it was very hard and I still dread the day.

* Sacrifice how I feel for the benefit of the person (or cat) who is really going through it i.e. we may be sad that someone is terminally ill, but it is not happening to us, it is happening to them.

* I should not panic at the first sign of something not going to my plan. The Universe is in charge of plans and is far better at it than me.

I've learnt lots more too but they're the key points. It's one none-stop learning-curve party in this house, let me tell you!

To anyone going through a 'rough patch', please try to have faith. God is on your side and even if you can't see a reason for what is going on, there will be one - it might just be a lesson for you, but remember only when the pupil is ready does the master appear.